The Ocatvi Conundrum

February 7, 2017 bore witness to a confluence of events the likes of which Brooklyn Latin has never seen. It was the day scores of discipuli rose up and walked out of class to protest the confirmation of Secretary of Education Betsy Devos in Manhattan’s Foley Square. It was the day a Junior/Senior approbation ceremony was uncharacteristically unattended. And it was the day Class I discipuli were overcome by anguish over their Senior tees.

After the approbation ceremony, Juniors darted home while the Seniors who had elected not to attend the walk-out swarmed the auditorium stage. Massive CustomInk boxes were strategically positioned along the stage’s edge. Eager hands inched towards the boxes, only to be shooed away by the authoritative gaze of Magister Matthew Baker as he did his best to orchestrate the scene.

From there, magistri divided into hand-out squadrons based on students’ last names. Eagerly the crowd rearranged itself into a somewhat more orderly state. Then from above rained purple tees as magistri belted out names and hurled shirts in the general direction of the owner. Early receivers shuffled out, grinning and admiring the tee’s classy font.

ELECTISSIMI OCTAVI (“Elite Eight”) read the shirt—or so they thought.

Eventually, all came to the same, haunting realization.

Emblazoned across the front was a glorious “ELECTISSIMI OCATVI.”

“Our four years of Latin had been for nothing!” some said; “Magistra Storniolo! Have you seen this?” asked others incredulously; “Aw shucks,” remarked the situationally detached.

Then of course there was the quintessential “I want my money back!”

But it was an honest mistake. An unfortunate, expensive mistake.

And it is one which has since been rectified with a round of replacement shirts, which miraculously made it to school just in time for Senior T-Shirt day.

The takeaway: chuckle heartily and remember that for Class I time now runs short, too short.